Bits and Pieces of Wisdom from Your Mama

With permission from my twin boys, I'm sharing this letter I recently wrote to them. Maybe you'll find something to live out or pass on in these "bits and pieces." I should certainly take my own advice! This is Part 1 of 3. 

Dear Allen and Davis,

            When you turned 18 years old, Dad and I asked some important men in your lives to write letters to you about growing up and what it means to be a man. Those letters are sweet and amazing and I hope you cherish them. But there are some things you need to hear from your Mama.  Here they are, in no particular order….

            Relationships – There's more to a relationship than just a pretty face, as they say. Y'all have both had the thrill of someone thinking you're pretty cool. I hope you have that again. But, if someone wants you to change just to please them or their parents, run. Don't look back. Don't confuse this with someone caring about you and wanting you to be stronger and smarter and better. Change just because you're not the way someone else wants you to be is stupid. There, I said it, stupid.

            Work – Find a job you love. It may seem weird to hear this from me since I've stayed home with you since you were born. But, if at all possible, do work you love. You may have to grunt out a year or two until you have money to make a good switch, experience that will look good on a resume, or freedom to make a move. Work that time out with grace. Just keep the end goal in mind, whatever you think that end might be. It will be wonderful if you can support a family on your income alone. Then, if you're blessed with a wife, she'll be able to choose whether she works or not. “Not” was my choice. My dream job was to take care of your daddy and you. I'm really, really blessed I was able to do it.

            Jesus – This guy comes first.  Do the hard work of finding a church that opens the Bible and teaches God's Word. More than that, let Jesus seep into every nook and cranny of who you are. Don't make decisions without asking Him. Don't let the day go by without talking with Him. Get a Bible app on your phone, set it up for a verse of the day, then actually read it. Let the Word inform and transform who you are and what you do. Don't be afraid to talk about God with people. Everyone needs Him and it will be your greatest privilege to lead someone to Jesus.

            While I think most of your Sunday mornings should be spent in church, there will be days you need to praise God while “walking through the vineyards.” Your dad and I learned this from a beautiful, Godly lady in Baden, Austria. We often drove through real-live vineyards in Baden. You may not have that luxury. Your “vineyards” may be a state park, a picnic spot or your backyard. Just find a place to BE. Take God there with you and praise Him.

            Don't Give Up – Suppose you don't get everything you want on the first try. Say things are hard in your job or a friendship or a marriage. Don't give up. Push through.

We drove to California from Alabama for this moment, 5 month old twin boys with their Nana, it was love at first sight on both sides

            Dream Big – Don’t settle for what’s right in front of you if you think there’s something better out there. God may tug at your heart or your sense of adventure or put an impossible thought in your head. Go for it! People thought it was crazy for Dad and me to go to Austria as missionaries. But that was our most wonderful adventure until God gave us you. It seemed mad to drive to California with five-month-old twins. But we introduced you to people who wouldn't have had the joy of meeting two such adorable, engaging boys otherwise. Do the hard, big, crazy thing!

            Know When to Give Up – Even though I just said, “don't give up,” sometimes you'll need to. You'll stumble into a situation where you thought you were supposed to go but, it won't be the place for you. Don't hang on out of stubbornness or fear or peer-pressure. Like tugging on your heart to do something wonderful, God may tug on your heart to show you a way out. It's not failure. It may just make good sense.

           To be continued next week.... Until then, what's the best advice you've ever received?