Bits and Pieces, Part 2

           Last week, I shared the beginning of a letter I wrote to my twin, 19 year old boys.  This is simply things I want to make sure they know. None of this is earth shattering, but hopefully it makes them think. It made me think as I wrote it, how I want to live, what I think is important and what I hope these two young men teach my grandkids one day.

           Here's Part 2 of 3. If you missed part 1, you can read it here.

           Clean Up – Clean up after yourself especially, but help others clean up too. You didn’t have many chores at home, but you know the general principles of washing dishes and clothes, dusting and vacuuming. Make “Tidying Up” a habit. It's not the “woman's job.” It's the job of all people who use a particular space. Change your sheets often and those crazy Mr. Clean “white sponges” will clean almost anything.

            Be the Leader- If you marry a Godly woman, and I hope and pray you do, she’s going to expect you to be the leader of your family. Step up to the plate. It will be hard and uncomfortable at times. You are both more than capable of leading with gentleness, strength and love.  You are fierce protectors. That quality will become more evident as you become a husband and a daddy. Don’t be afraid to do what you think is right.

That being said; listen to your wife. She will sometimes need to wisely appeal your decisions. Let her. If possible, do what she suggests. If it’s not possible, stand strong. God’s the head of you and your family. Ask Him, trust Him and do what He says. You and your family will feel the blessing of your obedience and leadership.

            Save Money – I think both of you are learning to be wise with money. I think some of that comes from Dave Ramsey. Dad and I have listened to him for years. Once when listening to Dave in the car, we heard a caller who was burdened with debt including an unwise, expensive car lease. Y’all had become “Dave” experts by this point. After hearing the caller’s story, you started yelling, “Sell the car!”

When you start making money, whether from a career or a part time job, start saving, start tithing and start giving. Don’t neglect the saving part and don’t get sucked into overspending like so many people in this world. You’ll regret it.

            Never stop learning – My goal as your homeschool teacher from third to ninth grade wasn’t simply to fill your heads. I wanted you to love learning. I realize there will be gaps in your education, things you’re curious about that you never learned. There are gaps in my education too. It’s what you do with those gaps that makes you a lifelong learner. Go to the library, keep a list of books or topics that are interesting and work your way through them. Some of the most fun and interesting people I know are curious and constant learners. If all you can manage is a chapter before bed, or several pages over lunch, don’t stop reading and learning. Ever. Just don’t stop.

            Bring flowers for no reason – Fresh flowers are a cheap and easy way to add beauty to your home. Your wife or girlfriend will appreciate it. It’s sweet and thoughtful and will earn you huge brownie points.

Flowers from Allen

            Pay attention – If flowers aren’t part of your wife or girlfriend’s love language, figure out what is. Maybe it’s an afternoon phone call just to say “Hey.” Maybe she’ll need a good, long hug when you get home. Maybe you need to write a letter to her once a year. Whatever it is, do it! Pay attention to what speaks to her heart. For that matter, just pay attention!

            Be kind – Be sweet to everyone, even your brother. Kindness goes a long way. Hold the door, let someone go ahead of you in the check-out line, be the first to introduce yourself. Take time to listen when someone’s upset. Ask if others need a hand. Buy lemonade from the kids at the lemonade stand down the street.

            Find the funny – There has always been a lot of laughter in our home. You guys are funny. Don’t be afraid to be silly. Keep looking for good, clean jokes and tell them often. The Bible says, “God, who sits in Heaven, laughs!” Psalm 2:4

            I was once at a baby shower where we prayed for the mom-to-be. One wise lady prayed for strength for the mom to get through her days. The woman also prayed when the new mom felt overwhelmed, she would just laugh, lay on the floor and laugh. I pray y’all will be able to do that and I pray your families will join in.

           To be continued next week! Last week I asked what's the best advice you've ever received. Now, I'd love to hear the best advice you've ever given someone else.